Cristina
Introverts are reserved people who enjoy spending time alone and tend to shy from socializing. And many of the times, they find that situation exhausting. They tend to mix in a different way than extroverts. Here are some of the ways on how to befriend an introvert.
Some ways to befriend an introvert
1. Unless it’s very urgent, don’t show up at their home without informing them
Most extroverted people don’t have trouble welcoming a surprise from family or a group of friends coming home. But an introvert doesn’t like that. They need more than extroverts to prepare to see people mentally. And to them, their homes are the safest and peaceful private space where they can relax calmly. Do not try to surprise them by gathering at their home without taking permission from the introvert friend.
2. Express genuine interest
Introverts like active participation as they face difficult times approaching and making friends. If you want to be their friend, there must be something magnetic in you that draws you to them. Don’t try to cross their boundaries. Please search for similar interests you have because it gives you a solid foundation.
3. If they have decided to have some time together with you, no one should be there
They feel hurtful when they feel like coming in between a group of people. They want to mean something in your life because if they’re friends with you, then you mean a lot to them. Because of the trimmer and limited energy, they don’t want to let anybody into the circle. Introverts value their close relationships for which they have given so much time to build and have stretched themselves so much to make it. If you have to invite other people, at least provide them with a notification. There’s hardly anything worse for introverts than being surrounded by a crowd when they’re expecting a closely acquainted chat.
4. Hang out with them one-on-one or in a small group of people
When you get an introvert alone, introverts tend to thrive in familiar settings because when an introvert is talking to one person, it suddenly reduces the stimulation level. Because the introvert only has to give attention to the other person’s words, body language, and tone of voice of only a single person. To the mind of an introvert who is busy with the internal stimulation that comes from being an introvert, paying attention to a single person is more than enough.
Talking one-on-one makes it easier to talk about more meaningful topics. Talking in groups tends to revolve around “safe” issues like what you did the whole day or how the new work project is going. An introvert likes to have deep conversations, sharing great ideas, and talking about the things that matter.
5. Show Care
If you hear an introverted person is sick or is in a problem, show your concern to him without feeling embarrassed. Although not showing you gratitude or thankfulness, the person will make a mental note to keep you around. And will be thankful and respectful to you from the bottom of my heart.
6. Encourage introverts to share thoughts
An introvert needs encouragement to chime, especially when in a group of people. Introverts often don’t talk about themselves or their opinions about anything until asked, giving them a chance to speak and open up. It is in nature to keep the thoughts within and only talk if the introvert has something of real value to add to the conversation.
Sometimes an introvert doesn’t say what’s running in his mind even if he’s willing to. And do ask the introvert how he is ? What he is thinking about? or needs help with.
7. Don’t judge when an introvert goes quiet or gets lost in his world
The inner world of an introvert is vital and alive and tends to process things deeply. It means that an introvert is habitual of daydreaming, suddenly going quiet, and needing more time to give back answers and come into the real world. If the introvert gets quiet for a moment and needs some extra time to think, let it be time-consuming without disturbing. If you do this, it will only make us feel highly self-conscious.
8. Let a quiet one talk, too
Introverts have some limits to listening and giving support by doing it. But introverts also need to speak and have deep conversations about interesting and meaningful topics. Make sure that the quiet one gets its turn to talk, at least for a short period.
9. Don’t expect to talk or contact an introvert constantly and give him time to be with himself
As most extroverted people do, an introvert doesn’t like to contact people to prove their relations constantly. It doesn’t mean that you’ve been forgotten or lost from their list. It means that they remember and think for at least one time in a day. An introvert knows that he will see you soon and in a way that is meaningful, face to face.
10. Try to create a comfort zone for the quiet one
The Comfort zone is the headspace in which an introvert is relaxed and does not feel anxious even slightly. An introvert represents his right side and flourishes in moving company. Give an appropriate smile to an introvert, which is necessary. Show open body language and keep your posture pointed toward him to show that you’re listening. Try to listen, and do not try to be subtle to it. Tell him things about yourself, since it may help them ease into similar conversations, and let him know that it is okay if he doesn’t want to share something in return.
11. Text instead of calling
If you want to befriend an introvert, try to talk on calls for an extended period instead of texting. Because an introvert doesn’t like to have a conversation, an introvert will prefer to have long discussions on calls or face-to-face so that the actual expressions can be seen and can notify their feelings quickly. An introvert loves to have conversations face to face with only one person at a time in a calm, peaceful, without distraction, and with 100% straightforwardness.
12. Try to be patient
It is not that after meeting the quiet one you don’t want to see you again. It’s just that an introvert on some level faces a little hard time processing that you’re just genuine and not just polite. If an introvert blows you off the first time, please ask the introvert again. Being persistent assures that you do like introverts and makes the whole thing intimidating.
13. Accept an introvert the way he is without trying to change him
An introvert is a loyal friend gifted to you, so try to be reliable from your side as well. Not seeing you in months or years or not talking with you doesn’t mean an introvert. If an introvert is your friend to you, he means it for the rest of his life. If the stuff gets bad, so try to make him feel that he is not a burden on you to be with him.
An introvert prefers to have a good time with his friends separately instead of having it at a party, get-together. So accept the way he is and try to make him comfortable by having some personal time with him. Be polite and genuine while having a conversation with an introvert so that he can identify your nature and you. Please don’t make him feel as he’s a burden on you which you have to carry for being a friend to an introvert. Listen to his opinion and perspective on which you are talking. Do not interrupt.
